Son's death leads mom to reach out

From the Ann Arbor News:

The call from the principal, a police officer at the door, your child in front of a judge: Most parents dread the shame that comes when their children make serious mistakes.

Barb Smith of Milan has written a book about her late son, Brent Legault, who died two years ago, and the family's attempts to have him stop using drugs and alcohol. She is donating the proceeds from the book to Dawn Farm, a local substance abuse program.

But the shame is nothing compared to the pain of learning that your child is gone.

Barb Smith of Milan watched as her son, Brent Legault, who suffered from alcohol and drug addiction, made many mistakes until the final phone call came on Dec. 4, 2005.
Brent's former girlfriend called from Green Bay, Wis., saying that a snowplow driver had found the 23-year-old dead in his car.

Barb Smith recently published "Brent's World," a memoir of her son's life and his struggles with addiction. She plans to donate proceeds to Dawn Farm, an Ypsilanti-based substance abuse rehabilitation program. Brent went to the agency's detox center briefly but walked out before completing the program.

Brent's death wasn't directly caused by drugs and alcohol, but Smith said his addictions are what caused her bright and artistic son to make the poor decisions that led up to him sleeping in his car in cold, snowy weather.

His death was caused by carbon monoxide poisoning, due to the damaged exhaust system his car had as the result of a previous accident. Tests showed there were no illegal drugs or alcohol in Brent's blood when he died, Smith said.

Despite his addictions, which made life with Brent chaotic and stressful, the young man had many good qualities, said his mother and stepfather, Tim Smith.

"He could play the piano beautifully. Every day he would come home and play the piano," Tim Smith said. Brent didn't usually play a written music piece - he'd just create a different tune every time he sat down, his stepfather said.

Where to get 'Brent's World' Barb Smith's book is published by Outskirts Press and available through Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble. Smith will also send the book directly. She can be contacted by e-mail at brentsworld23@yahoo.com. Smith is charging adults $10 for the book but will only charge teens her cost for the book, which is $5.83. Smith is donating proceeds from the book to Dawn Farm, a local substance abuse rehabilitation program. How to get help For help with drug and alcohol addiction, call Dawn Farm. For people who have used a substance within 72 hours, the detox program can be reached at 734-669-8265. For other programs, call 734-485-8725. Washtenaw County residents also can call 734-544-3050 for a treatment referral.

The young man was also a hard worker, Tim Smith said. Brent worked alongside his stepfather at the Tecumseh auto collision shop that Smith now owns.

And Brent was a loving big brother to Tim Smith's son T.J., who is now 15, he said. Brent and T.J. would listen to music in the basement, sharing the same headset. He was also close to his sister Rachel.

The first sign of drug abuse came when a principal at Scarlett Middle School called, saying that the 13-year-old had been caught trying to buy marijuana.

The next crisis was in 10th grade, when Brent was attending Belleville High School. The only class he passed that year was gym and he also got in trouble with the law. He was placed on a stringent probation that included an intensive outpatient treatment program and regular attendance at Alcoholics Anonymous meetings.

For Brent, the threat of jail was effective. He mostly complied with his treatment program, and was able to attend Milan High School and graduate. He even got three scholarships, Tim Smith said.

"For a year and a half, I got my son back," Barb Smith said. But when Brent turned 18, his probation was over and he started using again, his parents said. And now, because he was an adult, it was impossible to compel him into treatment.

He moved to Green Bay to be with his former girlfriend, but they broke up in 2005 after Brent's addiction became too much for the young woman to handle. Soon after their breakup, Brent attempted suicide.

He came back to Michigan and moved in with his parents and the summer that followed was wonderful, his parents said. They did many things they'd always wanted to do with Brent, like going to the Woodward Dream Cruise. But his addiction kicked back in and his use of substances escalated.

Practicing the tough love that many substance abuse specialists recommend, Barb Smith decided that Brent could not remain in the home if he continued to use. She's not sure that giving him the ultimatum was the right choice, because only a week later, Brent was dead. "I would never, ever tell anybody 'You have to kick him out,'" she said.

But Tim Smith said that with Brent smoking marijuana in front of T.J., the family had no choice. The couple, with a strong Christian faith, is grateful for some things despite Brent's death. They are grateful for that last summer together. Sometimes Barb Smith even looks at her son's relatively peaceful death as a blessing.

"Brent didn't have what it took to be in recovery so God took him home. Now he's out of his torment."